Work, Life, Growth

Three months postpartum and now a mom of three, I remember telling my husband that it was time for me to resign. This was not a decision I made overnight — I had debated it for a year or more for several reasons. Being home more with my kids during maternity leave made me realize just how much I was missing.

At the time, I was working more than 40 hours a week in the clinic and taking home more than 20 hours of work most weeks. I was sinking at home while trying to keep the clinic afloat and my team motivated.

I had played around with the idea of leaving, and when I found out I was pregnant with baby number three, I decided to stay for the benefits. I had already established my LLC but abruptly put things on pause because I was afraid — afraid of not being able to make enough money to help with household expenses, afraid of failing, and starting to doubt my own abilities.

As time went on, things at work became more stressful. Various situations made me question my professional identity. Then one day, after being confronted in a situation at work, I hit my breaking point. That’s when I decided the time was near.

But because of fear — fear of the unknown and fear of failure — I delayed my departure. once again. I was afraid to leave my team after working hard to create a culture of trust when they felt they couldn’t trust the other leadership. I had patients who made it clear they only wanted to see me. I had bills to pay and children to feed. I convinced myself it was easier to stay.

And it was easier — until it wasn’t.

It was easier to stay until I realized I would have to give up holding my baby during the day.

It was easier to stay until I sat on the ground doing crafts with my girls and reading books in the middle of the day, and realized that once maternity leave ended I would return to work and be too tired to enjoy these moments.

It was easier to stay until I realized what I was sacrificing and that I would have to go back to giving up so much of my time with my family and miss out of watching my children learn.

So, petrified of the unknown and the possibility of failure, I gave my resignation notice.

For someone like me — a planner who likes to have every moment of the day scheduled, including breaks — this was daunting. But I jumped, and I am so glad that I did.

Since taking that leap, many opportunities have come my way. One of the most important is that my husband and I have successfully managed homeschooling for three years now. My kids are thriving, and I get to spend much more time at home than I ever did before. Even though there are times I travel for professional tasks, I am still home far more than my previous schedule would have allowed. Watching my children learn to read, tell time, participate in science fairs, and tailoring learning to our family’s needs has been amazing. Yes, it can be stressful — but this is exactly what I prayed for. I wanted more time with them, and now I have it.

I now have the opportunity to attend and speak at events, teach other therapists and doctoral students. I have the opportunity to be involved in my local community and support others with their endeavors.

And still, it hasn’t been easy. For every moment of success, I can recall numerous accounts of failure. I can recall numerous times of self-sabotage and negative thinking. In hindsight, I can also now recognize how my desire to plan, became my biggest excuse to stall.

I distinctly remember the mixed emotions of both being excited, yet frustrated watching those who I coached start their businesses and succeed what seemed like immediately, all while I struggled to get my own off of the ground. The same principles that worked for the people I mentored didn’t seem to work for me. I eventually realized I needed to change my approach.

I went back to what I had done best when working for other organizations: I started serving my community. I provided education, supported other businesses and individuals, and showed up for people.

For someone who prefers staying home with a book in hand or running alone, it was a major shift to step out, have conversations, and build connections. But I had to start. I had to start showing up, start building my business, start building my brand.

And that was the hardest thing to realize — I just had to start. I had to start believing in myself.

Looking back, I wish I had started sooner. I am happy where I am now, but I often wonder: what if I had started when the desire to leave first came to mind? How much more could I have accomplished? How many more people could I have helped?

I can’t live in regret, but I also don’t want others to make the same mistake. You have to recognize that you won’t have everything figured out. As I mentioned earlier, I am a planner, and I’ve learned that sometimes planning is just a way for me to procrastinate. I convinced myself I had to have a solution for every possible problem — wasting so much energy worrying about scenarios that likely would never happen. (To be honest, this is still something I struggle with.)

But here’s what I know for sure: the first step is frequently the hardest — and likely the most important.

Because I want you to be able to start sooner than what I did, here are some tips to help you get things moving.

1. Write Down Your “Why.”
   Get brutally honest with yourself. Why do you want this change? What do you hope to gain? What are you no longer willing to sacrifice? Putting this on paper will keep you grounded when fear and doubt inevitably creep in. If you haven’t read Start with Why by Simon Sinek, I highly recommend it. It’s a powerful reminder that identifying your “why” is the foundation for creating meaningful impact — and staying focused when things get hard.
2. Take One Small Action Today.
   You don’t need to have the entire plan figured out. Just take one step.
   Maybe it’s registering your LLC, telling someone your idea, posting about your business, or making a single phone call. For me, my first small steps were setting up my website, researching health record systems, and creating a realistic budget to figure out my startup costs. If business ownership isn’t your goal, your “small step” might look different — ordering a book to study for a certification, signing up for a class, or waking up early to make it to the gym. Whatever it is, write it down and make it happen today.

3. Tell Someone.
   Say it out loud. Tell your spouse, a friend, or a mentor. Speaking your goal creates accountability and gives you permission to start. Accountability puts that extra fire under you to follow through — especially when it’s tempting to give up. Sometimes, we let ourselves down more easily than we let others down. Use that to your advantage. Ask someone you trust to check in with you, encourage you, and help keep you on track.

Conclusion:
Starting is scary — but staying stuck is scarier. You don’t need all the answers, the perfect plan, or a guarantee of success before you take that first step. Your “why” will keep you focused, your small actions will build momentum, and your support system will push you forward when fear tries to hold you back.

You are capable of more than you think. A better version of you is waiting on the other side, but first you have to start moving. You have to start believing.